Custody orders are legally binding court orders, not suggestions. When your co-parent refuses to follow the parenting time schedule, withholds the children, or consistently violates other provisions in your custody agreement, you have legal options to enforce the order and protect your parenting rights.

Our team regularly helps parents address custody violations ranging from occasional schedule conflicts to systematic denial of parenting time. Our Tacoma, WA custody lawyer can assess your situation and recommend the appropriate enforcement strategy based on the severity and pattern of violations.

Common Types Of Custody Violations

Custody violations take many forms. Some parents simply don’t return children at the scheduled time, showing up hours late or keeping them overnight when they should be with the other parent. Others refuse to allow scheduled parenting time altogether, making excuses or ignoring the custody order entirely.

Interference with communication violates many custody orders. If your agreement includes provisions about phone calls or video chats during the other parent’s time and they consistently prevent this contact, they’re violating the order.

Unilateral decision-making when you share legal custody constitutes a violation. Making major decisions about education, healthcare, or religion without consulting you breaches joint legal custody provisions.

Relocation without proper notice or court approval violates custody orders. Most agreements require advance notification before moving beyond a certain distance. Moving without following these procedures is a serious violation.

Document Everything

Before taking legal action, build a solid record of violations. Documentation proves the pattern and severity of non-compliance when you present your case to the court.

Keep a detailed log of every violation. Note the date, time, and specific nature of each incident. Record when your co-parent was late for exchanges, how late they were, and any communication about the delay. Document missed parenting time, denied phone calls, or other violations.

Save all relevant communications. Text messages, emails, and voicemails discussing or acknowledging custody violations become important evidence. Don’t delete messages even if they’re frustrating to read.

Screenshot or save communications that show patterns of behavior. If your co-parent repeatedly makes last-minute excuses about why they can’t follow the schedule, preserve those messages.

Get witness statements when possible. If exchanges happen in public places or in front of others, ask those witnesses to document what they observed. Their statements corroborate your account of violations.

Attempt To Resolve Issues Informally First

Before filing court motions, try addressing violations directly with your co-parent. Sometimes scheduling conflicts or misunderstandings create problems that communication can resolve.

Send a clear written message referencing the specific custody order provisions and explaining how recent actions violated those terms. Keep this communication factual and non-accusatory. The goal is resolving the problem, not escalating conflict.

Consider whether the violations stem from legitimate emergencies or confusion about the order. Occasional lateness due to traffic or work emergencies differs from systematic refusal to follow the schedule.

If informal communication doesn’t resolve the issue and violations continue, escalate to formal legal remedies. Some parents view informal approaches as weaknesses and continue violating orders until courts impose consequences.

Filing A Motion For Contempt

Contempt proceedings address willful violations of court orders. When a parent deliberately disobeys custody orders without legitimate justification, contempt motions hold them accountable.

A contempt motion asks the court to find the violating parent in contempt and impose sanctions. You must prove that a valid court order exists, the other parent knew about the order, they had the ability to comply, and they willfully violated the order’s terms.

Courts can impose various sanctions for contempt including:

Ordering makeup parenting time to compensate for missed visits
Requiring the violating parent to pay your attorney fees
Imposing fines payable to the court
Modifying custody arrangements to prevent future violations
In extreme cases, jail time for continued willful violations

The burden of proof for contempt is relatively high. You must show intentional disobedience, not just inability to comply. If your co-parent has legitimate reasons they couldn’t follow the order, such as documented medical emergencies, they likely won’t be found in contempt.

Motion To Enforce Custody Order

Enforcement motions provide another avenue for addressing violations. These motions ask the court to enforce existing custody orders and may request specific remedies like makeup parenting time or clarification of ambiguous order provisions.

Enforcement motions sometimes work better than contempt proceedings when violations result from confusion about order terms rather than willful disobedience. The court can clarify expectations and order compliance going forward.

Makeup Parenting Time

When your co-parent denies or cuts short your parenting time, courts often order makeup time to compensate. This additional parenting time helps preserve your relationship with your children and makes clear that violations have consequences.

Makeup time typically mirrors the lost time. If you missed a weekend, you might receive an extra weekend. For missed holidays, courts might award the same holiday the following year or equivalent special time.

Request specific makeup time in your motion. Don’t just ask the court to order makeup time generally. Propose exact dates and times so the court can include them in any order.

Modifying Custody Based On Violations

Persistent, serious custody violations can justify modifying the underlying custody order. If one parent repeatedly refuses to follow the schedule or systematically interferes with the other parent’s time, the court might change custody arrangements.

Modification based on violations requires showing that the violations are substantial and ongoing. A few isolated incidents typically won’t warrant custody modification, but patterns of interference might.

Courts might reduce the violating parent’s parenting time, change legal custody arrangements, or implement other modifications that address the violations and protect the children’s relationships with both parents.

Emergency Orders

Some custody violations require immediate court intervention. If your co-parent takes the children and refuses to return them, disappears with the children, or puts them in danger, emergency orders provide faster relief than standard court processes.

Emergency or ex parte orders can be issued quickly, sometimes within hours or days rather than the weeks typical court proceedings require. These orders address urgent situations where waiting for regular hearings would cause irreparable harm.

You’ll need to demonstrate true emergencies, not just inconvenient violations. The children must face immediate risk or the situation must require urgent intervention to protect parental rights.

Police Involvement

Law enforcement can sometimes help enforce custody orders, though their role is limited. If you have a custody order and the other parent refuses to return your children at the scheduled time, police might intervene.

Bring a copy of your custody order when seeking police assistance. Officers need to see the court order to verify your legal right to the children at that time.

Police involvement works best for clear-cut violations during scheduled exchanges. Officers are less likely to intervene in disputed situations or when order terms are ambiguous.

Understand that police often view custody disputes as civil matters requiring court intervention rather than criminal issues. They might decline to get involved and direct you to file court motions instead.

What Not To Do

Never retaliate by withholding your own parenting time or violating the custody order yourself. Two wrongs don’t make a right, and your violations will undermine your legal position when seeking enforcement.

Don’t withhold child support because your co-parent violates custody orders. Child support and custody are separate legal issues. Stopping support payments gives the other parent grounds to pursue contempt against you.

Avoid discussing the violations extensively with your children. While they may witness problems, making them feel caught in the middle or asking them to report on the other parent damages their wellbeing.

Don’t make unilateral decisions to compensate for your co-parent’s violations. If they miss their parenting time, you can’t simply decide to keep the children permanently or refuse future parenting time. Follow legal processes for addressing violations.

Long-Term Solutions

Repeated enforcement actions suggest the underlying custody arrangement isn’t working. Consider whether modifications might reduce conflict and violations.

Some parents benefit from more detailed custody orders that leave less room for interpretation. Adding specific provisions about exchange times, locations, and procedures can prevent disputes about order terms.

Structured exchanges at neutral locations sometimes reduce conflict. Meeting at police stations, public places, or using custody exchange services removes opportunities for confrontations.

Moving Forward With Enforcement

Custody violations undermine children’s relationships with both parents and create instability in their lives. When informal resolution fails, legal enforcement protects your parenting rights and holds the other parent accountable for following court orders. If your co-parent is violating your custody agreement and informal approaches haven’t resolved the problem, reach out to Robinson & Hadeed today to discuss enforcement options including contempt proceedings, makeup parenting time requests, and potential custody modifications that address ongoing violations.

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